Film Snark

10 black-and-white Dalmatian puppies (all with spots, some with black ears) and two adult Dalmatian dogs (Pongo, with a red collar and black ears, and Perdita, with a blue collar and white ears with spots) sit on the carpet in a living room watching a TV. There's an orange, yellow, blue and red circular carpet under the television and a brown pouf and brown tea table behind the dogs.
B-
Disney Animated Features

One Hundred and One Dalmatians
Released: January 5th, 1961

I definitely used to like this one a lot more as a kid too. But all in all it's cute and fun. Just not sure how much I want to rewatch it.

Haha, Roger stomping on the floor while violently playing Cruella De Vil on the piano and trumpet. Why the hell would anyone let Cruella in their house? Like, is that just like..............British politeness? What the hell. How did Cruella find out they were having puppies after all? Like there was no prep for this. "We're a couple and now this maniac wants to take our puppies!!!!" The premise is........weak-ish.

Notable Grossness

Boy I love Pongo evaluating ladies to match his owner with. 😳 Yeah, love it. :vom: "Crazy woman driver" from the truck driver....oh for pete's sake.

James says the illustration is a lot like Chuck Jones illustrations and I agree. I tried to find out if Chuck Jones worked on this film, but it's kind of confusing. Several sources list Chuck Jones as having given an opinion about the animation method on 101 Dalmations, but his only credit for Disney is as a layout artist on Sleeping Beauty. He also has no credits between 1959 and 1973 on IMDB, which seems weird. But I don't know anything about Chuck Jones so who knows. Anyway, it's a very particular kind of animation and sometimes I like it and some times I don't - sometimes it looks nice and artistic and sometimes it looks unfinished or lazy.

Why does Roger smushing the little puppy bring it back to life? Is it like CPR? Or....what?

Doesn't Nanny understand that if she hadn't told Cruella they would get spots, there would have been no movie?

Jasper and Horace are horrifying; I despise them. Busting in the house is literally gross and traumatic, fuck those guys. BTW, who THE FUCK is Cruella De Vil and how is she hiring fucking sneakthieves, like - what is she, storming down to town in her ostentatious furs, shouting in the alleys "I'M LOOKING TO HIRE SOME THIEVES WHO WILL STEAL PUPPIES".

Scotland Yard is investigating a dognapping? REALLY?

"You couldn't get half a dozen coats out of the whole caboodle." You couldn't get..........ONE coat out of 99 puppies. "Bash them over the head" - won't that get blood on the friggin coats? For serious, this is a really poorly planned coat-making operation, not going to lie.

Um...hi....those puppies belong to somebody, you can't just adopt 84 puppies - why not use the twilight bark to find out whose kids they are?

I feel like I spent the whole movie wishing the humans weren't talking, except when Roger is singing about Cruella. I remember Cruella being more fun, but she's just annoying.

PS, my favorite part is when Lucky says, "And my nose is froze. And my ears are froze. And my toes are froze." Lucky, a white Dalmatian puppy with black ears, a black nose, and a few black spots, dangles from his collar, which is being held off screen. It is snowing, and the caption says, 'My tails froze, and my nose is froze, and my ears are froze, and my toes are froze'

I love when they roll in the soot and disguise themselves as labs, and when they get snow dropped on them, it causes me so much damn anxiety.

Also that Mercedes Benz is pretty incredible at snow plowing and driving after the entire top has been ripped off. The driving scene also causes me anxiety, like, jeezus. But it also has one of the worst animation moments, when they just shake the animated painting to indicate a car crash - just...looks awful, personally.

How did "Cruella De Vil" become a hit on the radio in like 2 days? Amazing. Dalmatian Plantation is a dumb song. There I said it.

March 16th, 2021
Pete's Dragon
A movie release poster shows a group of white people, 4 men, a woman, and a young boy, surrounding a green animated dragon with pink wings and red hair. The poster says "Coming at Christmas, Walt Disney Productions' Pete's Dragon"
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Five human actors, a woman, a man, and three children of various ages, sit on a flying brass bed with a floral blanket, with the moon and clouds behind them. Below them, illustrated animals are in various poses: two fish dance together (one in a suit); two fish and an octopus play in a band together with the words "The Briny Boys" on the front of the drum kit; an alligator, a rhino, and a gorilla run around a soccer field in yellow and green athletic outfits; a lion in a crown and red royal robe stands with one foot on the soccer ball; and a secretary bird in a suit with glasses stands watching.

Recent Snark

Bert, a chimney sweep, Jane, a young blonde child in a red dress and yellow overcoat, Michael, a young strawberry blonde child in short pants and a button coat, and Mary Poppins, a nanny in a red dress with a black hat with white flowers, stand on a rooftop, covered in soot.

Mary Poppins

Julie Andrews is a genuine delight, whether she's being fun or she's irritated. It's not just her voice, her whole presence is just delightful. George and Winifred Banks are excellent side characters, and the kids are as adorable as they need to be. Dick Van Dyke is a national treasure and I won't hear a word against him.

Structurally, there's not really a plot, but that makes sense given that it's based on a series of kind of episodic books. It's also very long. I think the length and episodic nature takes away from the character study of stuffy, cross Mr. Banks and how he learns from his children (and Mary Poppins and Bert) how to retain a sense of wonder and joy. But it's consistently fun. The music is delightful, the dancing is wonderful, and the adventures Mary Poppins and Bert and the kids go on are spectacular. I'm sure I have nostalgia for it but I think this stands up, to be honest.

The dings on the grade are for occasional bad costumes, bad makeup, the length, the imperialist nonsense. I'm honestly tempted to raise it back up because of the flawless animation/live action melding.

September 13th, 2022
Bigfoot, a giant humanoid creature with red fur, sits in front of a cardboard box with a downward pointing arrow on the side, wearing a pair of white men's briefs underwear on his head. He holds the crotch hole open with his fingers so he can look out. Goofy, a dog-like humanoid cartoon with black skin and a pale face, and long ears, watches from his yellow car several hundred feet behind Bigfoot, with his son Max in the passenger seat; Max looks similar to Goofy.

A Goofy Movie

I know this is shameful for someone my age but I've never seen this movie before. I may have caught bits of it when my brothers were younger, but the only thing I remember is Pauly Shore doing the leaning tower of cheese-a. I'm pretty much going into this one blind.

March 1st, 2022