Film Snark

A brown fawn (Bambi) with brown eyes looks at a gray bunny (Thumper) with white tail and white chest fur; they are both smiling.
B-
Disney Animated Features

Bambi
Released: August 21st, 1942

I thought I was going to hate this but I didn't. I was REALLY surprised at how much I liked this.

Oh man. I have had the narrative in my head that I hate Bambi for like 20 years. I DO NOT HATE BAMBI. I like Bambi, it's precious, and the animation is excellent. The backgrounds show the life of the forest with a beautiful, almost Impressionistic artistic quality. The realistic movement of the deer, from fawn to adult, are accurate and emotionally moving; when they bolted from the meadow, my heart raced.

Notable Grossness

A BREAK FROM RACISM. BAMBI TO THE RESCUE.

I also thought they did an excellent job of character building, again. The owl, the panicky quail, the other buck who tries to fight Bambi for Feline, they all felt so real to me. And watching the animals show affection for each other (like Bambi and Feline's kids at the end, where the one bites the other one's ear, or Flower and Bambi touching noses), just landed so much more for me than anything in Dumbo. Bambi, a young brown buck with his antlers stuck in a tree branch with pink flowers scrunches up his face while Feline, a young brown doe, licks his face. The caption says, 'Get offa me'

The music, even though it's not particularly memorable (i.e. I couldn't sing along with it, or remember it specifically later), is beautiful. I love this era's choral numbers.

One note, it seemed like the spring song came too soon after Bambi's mother was killed. READ THE ROOM, BIRDS.

It occurs to me that years ago I had the idea for a dating app that used Twitter as a base for profiles, that I was going to call Twitterpated. I didn't realize I got that term from Bambi, but I sure did.

Also I sorted Bambi, Thumper, and Flower into Hogwarts houses (because of course I did) - Flower is a Hufflepuff ("He can call me a flower if he wants to."), Thumper is a Gryffindor (diving into the snow to slide out onto the ice, sticking his nose in caves), and Bambi is a Ravenclaw (because the minute he is introduced to the world, he tries to learn the names for everything). Fight me.

December 1st, 2020
Pete's Dragon
A movie release poster shows a group of white people, 4 men, a woman, and a young boy, surrounding a green animated dragon with pink wings and red hair. The poster says "Coming at Christmas, Walt Disney Productions' Pete's Dragon"
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Five human actors, a woman, a man, and three children of various ages, sit on a flying brass bed with a floral blanket, with the moon and clouds behind them. Below them, illustrated animals are in various poses: two fish dance together (one in a suit); two fish and an octopus play in a band together with the words "The Briny Boys" on the front of the drum kit; an alligator, a rhino, and a gorilla run around a soccer field in yellow and green athletic outfits; a lion in a crown and red royal robe stands with one foot on the soccer ball; and a secretary bird in a suit with glasses stands watching.

Recent Snark

Bert, a chimney sweep, Jane, a young blonde child in a red dress and yellow overcoat, Michael, a young strawberry blonde child in short pants and a button coat, and Mary Poppins, a nanny in a red dress with a black hat with white flowers, stand on a rooftop, covered in soot.

Mary Poppins

Julie Andrews is a genuine delight, whether she's being fun or she's irritated. It's not just her voice, her whole presence is just delightful. George and Winifred Banks are excellent side characters, and the kids are as adorable as they need to be. Dick Van Dyke is a national treasure and I won't hear a word against him.

Structurally, there's not really a plot, but that makes sense given that it's based on a series of kind of episodic books. It's also very long. I think the length and episodic nature takes away from the character study of stuffy, cross Mr. Banks and how he learns from his children (and Mary Poppins and Bert) how to retain a sense of wonder and joy. But it's consistently fun. The music is delightful, the dancing is wonderful, and the adventures Mary Poppins and Bert and the kids go on are spectacular. I'm sure I have nostalgia for it but I think this stands up, to be honest.

The dings on the grade are for occasional bad costumes, bad makeup, the length, the imperialist nonsense. I'm honestly tempted to raise it back up because of the flawless animation/live action melding.

September 13th, 2022
Bigfoot, a giant humanoid creature with red fur, sits in front of a cardboard box with a downward pointing arrow on the side, wearing a pair of white men's briefs underwear on his head. He holds the crotch hole open with his fingers so he can look out. Goofy, a dog-like humanoid cartoon with black skin and a pale face, and long ears, watches from his yellow car several hundred feet behind Bigfoot, with his son Max in the passenger seat; Max looks similar to Goofy.

A Goofy Movie

I know this is shameful for someone my age but I've never seen this movie before. I may have caught bits of it when my brothers were younger, but the only thing I remember is Pauly Shore doing the leaning tower of cheese-a. I'm pretty much going into this one blind.

March 1st, 2022