Film Snark

Dumbo, a gray baby elephant with very large ears, wearing an orange and yellow collar and a yellow hat, is flying through the air with a black feather curled in his trunk. He is surrounded by four Black crows, Fats, Deacon, Dopey, and Specks.
C-
Disney Animated Features

Dumbo
Released: October 23rd, 1941

This is really not that great.

I don't know what the appeal is here, to be honest. I'm sure I liked this as a kid. But the story seems to be dragged out; I still don't get the point of the pink elephants bit other than "Dumbo is drunk" which...okay? If I didn't know Dumbo was made in 1941, I would put that pink elephant animation at the 60s. I don't like that style but maybe that meks it ahead of its time? The animation is nothing special. Nothing has much detail, it's very broad strokes, and the coloring doesn't have a lot of depth. The music's not great, the story is fine but not that exciting. Dumbo flies once before he loses the magic feather and then learns he had it in him all along, and then the movie's over. I think because this wasn't a big watch for me as a kid, I don't have nostalgia for it, either. This feels like a Disney short they stretched into a movie.

Notable Grossness

Racial stereotypes in the crows, faceless black laborers putting up the circus

Dumbo, a young gray elephant with big blue eyes wearing a yellow hat and a red and yellow collar, hiccups a few dozen yellow bubbles while standing over a wooden tank, then falls to the side of the tank, his eyes drooping and his trunk trailing off the edge of the tank until it falls off, one more bubble popping up from his trunk. The caption reads, 'Me since quarantine started'

Given how little actually happens in this movie, I don't really have much else to say about it. I also suspect I'm causing lots of people to hate me with this grade. 😂

November 24th, 2020
Pete's Dragon
A movie release poster shows a group of white people, 4 men, a woman, and a young boy, surrounding a green animated dragon with pink wings and red hair. The poster says "Coming at Christmas, Walt Disney Productions' Pete's Dragon"
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Five human actors, a woman, a man, and three children of various ages, sit on a flying brass bed with a floral blanket, with the moon and clouds behind them. Below them, illustrated animals are in various poses: two fish dance together (one in a suit); two fish and an octopus play in a band together with the words "The Briny Boys" on the front of the drum kit; an alligator, a rhino, and a gorilla run around a soccer field in yellow and green athletic outfits; a lion in a crown and red royal robe stands with one foot on the soccer ball; and a secretary bird in a suit with glasses stands watching.

Recent Snark

Bert, a chimney sweep, Jane, a young blonde child in a red dress and yellow overcoat, Michael, a young strawberry blonde child in short pants and a button coat, and Mary Poppins, a nanny in a red dress with a black hat with white flowers, stand on a rooftop, covered in soot.

Mary Poppins

Julie Andrews is a genuine delight, whether she's being fun or she's irritated. It's not just her voice, her whole presence is just delightful. George and Winifred Banks are excellent side characters, and the kids are as adorable as they need to be. Dick Van Dyke is a national treasure and I won't hear a word against him.

Structurally, there's not really a plot, but that makes sense given that it's based on a series of kind of episodic books. It's also very long. I think the length and episodic nature takes away from the character study of stuffy, cross Mr. Banks and how he learns from his children (and Mary Poppins and Bert) how to retain a sense of wonder and joy. But it's consistently fun. The music is delightful, the dancing is wonderful, and the adventures Mary Poppins and Bert and the kids go on are spectacular. I'm sure I have nostalgia for it but I think this stands up, to be honest.

The dings on the grade are for occasional bad costumes, bad makeup, the length, the imperialist nonsense. I'm honestly tempted to raise it back up because of the flawless animation/live action melding.

September 13th, 2022
Bigfoot, a giant humanoid creature with red fur, sits in front of a cardboard box with a downward pointing arrow on the side, wearing a pair of white men's briefs underwear on his head. He holds the crotch hole open with his fingers so he can look out. Goofy, a dog-like humanoid cartoon with black skin and a pale face, and long ears, watches from his yellow car several hundred feet behind Bigfoot, with his son Max in the passenger seat; Max looks similar to Goofy.

A Goofy Movie

I know this is shameful for someone my age but I've never seen this movie before. I may have caught bits of it when my brothers were younger, but the only thing I remember is Pauly Shore doing the leaning tower of cheese-a. I'm pretty much going into this one blind.

March 1st, 2022